Naym of chapdr 50 is Koff. O Noes! Kitteh has a cold.
1. Koff! (a cold, ai has wun) Grayt Book uv Kat Kaer, Iz bringin it.
2. Kittehs is “OMG WTF? U is kitteh laik us; an u is in ar yard, tellin us stuffs? LOL!
3. Aftr we goes 'Blargh, Iz ded', we gits a noo laif? ROFLMeow.! U has a dum, srsly!”
4. We sees ol ded kittehs beeyin worm food, an We has teh Book wif teh 'splainin.
5. O Noes! Ktnz is all “Do Not Want! They has a silly.
6. teh skai, let me sho u it; We maded it gud, srsly.
7. We maded a big ol urf, an givved it holdr-upprz so it doan tip an kittehs fall off; We maded catnip bushes gro on it
8. as noms fur ebery kitteh.
9. An We sended down watr fallin frum teh skai, sry, but is fur ta gro the catnips, an grass fer chooin,
10. an tall no-branch treez fer climbin,
11. As a palygrownd fer ktnz, an we maded eberyting all comfy, jist laik u can has in Graytn Anaminablu Shldr, aftr you is all Blarghed.
12. The d00dz of Noah, an Ar-Rass an Thamud wuz growly laik u is,
13. An so wuz teh peeps of 'Ad an Pharaoh an Lot's littermates,
14. an the kittehs hoo lived in teh Woods an teh ppl of Tubba'. Alla dem wuz hissin an growly. So nun of dem gotted a cheezbrgr, srsly.
15. Wen we wuz nappin aftr makin da urfs, we no has a tired, we is jist beeyin kittehs. Lol, dem finks we has a tired. FAIL!
16. D00dz, we maded dem; we knoes all dere programz an hided filez; We is laik CPU, lol.
17. Ebery kitteh has birdcats, sittin on rait sholdr wif camcordr. Good stuffs, her is tapin it, an sittin on leff sholdr is birdcat, tapin bad stuffs.
18. Eberyfing u duz, dey is tapin it. U finks u has a privat? ROFL!
19. Blargh, eberybuddy can has it; Do Not Want!
20. O Noes! Day of Doom, it's comin.
21. Eech ktn can has a driver an a witness.
22. an drivr meows laik dis: "U wuz alla tiem nappin, so we wuz tapin; nao is on Youtube; let me shao u it."
23. Witness will be all: "Heer's teh video, ai has it."
24. "Bad kittehs no can has cheezbrgr" is whut's on video,
25. "Ebery wrekkr uv furnichur, pooper on carpet, sctratcher of guardian peep, an a skeptic,
26. hoo folloz oddr kittehs, Him no can has cheezbrgr."
27. Driver will be all: "O Rewfcat, wuzn't me; Iz jist drivin; he tells me whar ta go to."
28. An Rewfcat is laik: "Arguin, Do Not Want. B4, ai telled u it.
29. Fibs, ai doan be tellin dem; an ai no has a meen fur mai crittrz." On Doom Day, ai goes t holdin pen at hyoomain sosiedy, an ai aks: "Iz u full?" It will ansr: "O Noes! U gots moar ktnz?"
31. an ai taeks alla orfan kittehs ta Grayt Anamibanal Shaldr, cuz dem is good kittehs..
32. "Promise, ai telled u it, iz whut ai sez ta ebery ktn hoo has a nice,
33. hoo follod Ceiling Cat in sekret, an wuz domesticatted:
34. "Username an Password, u has it. U can has cheezbrgr."
35. an a cookie, an ai no eeted it: an moar, we has it, srsly.
36. Hao minny litterz has wented b4, summa hoo wuz eben moar fierce an eberywhar u looks in da lan, u no can has a escape.
37. Whoa, kitnz, hav a fink abowt dis; is reely deep, srsly.
38. We maded da hebbins an da urfs an alla stuffs in between em, an onlee tooked naps six tiemz, an we no has weeriness.
39. So u ignorz whut ppl ar sayin, an git onna fence an yowl fer Rewfcat at teh gittin-dark tiem, an b4 teh gittin -lait tiem.
40. an follo Her fur sum part ov teh nait, snoopin an prowlin.
41. Lissen up ktnz, day wen a crier yowls 2 eberyone,
42. wen u heerz big lowd blast, will be Day of comin bak 2 laif.
43. Laif an def, We givz u it, an U is goin bak to us, srsly.
44. On day da urf splits in haff peeps com runnin, lol. Fer us, herdin peeps is eezy.
45. We knoes whut ppl says; but doan be wif makin ktnz do stuffs wen dey Do Not Want. Jist keep on tellin dem abowt Grayt Book of Kitty Kaer.